Thursday, August 12, 2010


8-5 job. Please stop kicking my ass. I still haven't learned to go to bed at a reasonable hour no matter how hard I try. Then the weekend comes and I want to crash out like a baby around 8 pm.

Self. Your new job comes with a fancy city-wide gym membership. Please find the motivation to get your booty out of bed early and go work out. (Although I have enjoyed checking out some of the classes while I sip my morning coffee. Nothing like seeing a bunch of people get their butts kicked in Boot Camp while you look through a window drinking coffee).

Self. Please go through the box of crap that you cleaned out of your old desk to see what needs to go into your new desk. Get rid of the crap that you don't need. As in - put in the trash.

Body. Please stop falling apart. Yes you have insurance through your husband, but I'd appreciate it if you'd stay together until I have time to become eligible for new benefits and can compare plans. New ailments are also NOT COOL.

Time. Anyway you could multiply? I'd really appreciate having a little bit more of you each day.

Onsite coffee shop. You will be the death of me. Yes you're nowhere compared to Starbucks in price, but you're so good and you're just right there AND you even have the sugar that I use no which NO ONE HAS because it costs $800 a packet. (Plus it doesn't help that my office can compare to a meat locker and so all I want to do is hug a giant cup of hot coffee)

AT&T Cell Phone Company. You suck. I had no idea you did something like CHARGE A MONTH IN ADVANCE. You think you'd put something like that in big fat letters somewhere when one is signing up with you. That way they don't have to pay 1/2 a month to their old cell phone company and then a month and a half to you all in the same month. You currently blow and my checkbook hates you.


  1. I just got a new number from AT&T and received my first bill. Funny how the email I have from them states my plan will cost me $49.99 a month. I was just a tad surprised that it was over $200 this month. Nice!

  2. Interesting letter...hope things get better! Yum for warm coffee...or coffee like products i.e. hot chocolate.


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