Thursday, July 29, 2010

Conversations with Dad

I don't talk about them a lot but my family are a bunch of characters. If I were to ever do stand up most of my material would come from my family. They'd also make a fantastic book of short stories. One day my friends. One day.

So I call home just to catch up and I get my dad who was in a talking mood for once. Just so you know my dad is not one to remember special occasions and if he does remember you generally get your gift wrapped in a Wal-Mart bag.

Dad: So guess what I'm doing for your mom and I's anniversary?
Me: I have no idea.
Dad: *with so much pride in his voice* Well it will be 33 years on the 26th and so I booked us a room for the weekend in Huntsville.
Me: *stomach drops* Dad. Please tell me you are not taking Mom to an execution.
Dad: What!? I go to one execution and you all think I've become some kind of execution groupie.
Me: Well, why else would you go to Huntsville? Last I checked Huntsville didn't exactly scream romantic weekend getaway. There's a prison there or you go hunting nearby and please tell me you're not taking mom hunting for your anniversary.
Dad: No. I have Crime Stoppers training so while I'm doing my training all day Saturday Mom can run around Huntsville and do her thing.
Me: Crime Stoppers? Like the neighborhood watch?
Dad: No. I'm on the Board of Crime Stoppers and I have to go to training.
Me: So Crime Stoppers like you call into the news to report something?
Dad: Yeah. We get to decide if people get a reward and for how much.
Me: Ok Dad. Weird. Just weird.
Dad: Well work wants all the managers involved in some kind of community service so this is my community service.
Me: So you're using your training weekend as a dual anniversary weekend.
Dad: Well they're paying for the hotel and it does happen to fall on our anniversary.

I talked to my mom later and she does tell me there are a bunch of little antique stores that she's looking forward to visiting.


  1. I love your family stories. I want to go to Thanksgiving at your house this year. I think it would be a ball!

  2. This sounds exactly like something my dad might do.

  3. hahahhaah, this is hilarious! Thank goodness my husband knows better!


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