Tuesday, March 16, 2010

John's Ten on Tuesday



This Ten on Tuesday is being answered by John. These are totally his type of questions. In fact, these questions are along the line of the totally random things he asks me almost every day. I think he even asked me about zombies recently. For the record, I like the slow stupid zombies from Shaun of the Dead, not the crazy strong zombies like in Resident Evil. I would totally play stupid like they did in the movie to move along the zombies and would probably hide out in a bar as well. Although John's answer on where to go is pretty awesome as well and they have beer there so it works for me. Enjoy!

1. Quick! Zombies are coming!! What do you do?
Step 1. Get armed and dangerous. (Blunt force weapons are good, guns are better)
Step 2. Know your surroundings. Get to an easily defensible location.
Step 3. Get informed. Watch the news, call your friends and family. Find info on cures and/or safe havens.

2. Whew, that was a close one. …I think your phone is ringing. Oh, it’s your best friend! She thinks she’s been bitten by a zombie. What advice do you give her?
Make sure she has actually been bitten, if she has, don't give her advice; wait for her to change to a zombie and then blast her head off... its what she would want.

3. You realize it’s time to leave your current location because it’s clearly not safe anymore. Are you going to move at night or day? Defend your reasoning.
Day. I can see better and generally zombies attack at night.(see: I Am Legend)

4. During your relocation, you come across a weapon superstore. My, that’s convenient. What kind of weaponry do you choose?
Something that has lots of ammo. Generally zombies aren't super powerful, there just happen to be a lot of them, so you don't need lots of firepower, just lots and lots of ammo - preferably something that reloads quickly too. I would carry 6 handguns with laser sights, 1 sawed-off shotguns, 1 sub-machine gun; a long range rifle + scope, and just for good measure, a Hatori Hanso katana. I would also carry a large knife in my boot, a flak jacket, a duffel bag full of ammo and explosives, and a handful of granola bars and water.

5. As you leave, an old lady on the side of the street begs you to help her. Do you? Why or why not?
Of course I would. I am still human after all, but if she showed any signs of changing, I would blast her to pieces.

6. Good choice, you’re clearly a good person to have around in a zombie apocalypse. Oh hey, there’s a wifi signal here! You can’t stay long but this is your chance to gather some intel on the current situation. What’s the first website you check?
Probably yahoo.com because that is my homepage, but after that I would probably check one of the major news sites. (ie. CNN or something like that.)

7. SHH! What was that noise?!
Its the sound of me reloading my guns and starting up the Humvee. If you heard some zombies we are getting the hell out of here right now with guns blazing. DON'T wait for them to discover you(inevitable) and DONT split up(unless you have a death wish) and above all DONT let down your guard for a second.

8. I think it’s time to get out of here. I hope you have a plan. Where are you going now?
WalMart. After hours and hours of consideration and debate, this is where to go. They have food and guns and entertainment. There are only 2 ways in and out which can be barricaded pretty easily. If the zombies do breach your defenses, have an escape plan ready to go on the roof (helicopter, or ultralite, or even a slide down to your Humvee) and then make your getaway, leaving a WalMart full of zombies, which you have boobie trapped.

9. Wait a minute, that looks like a bite mark on your arm… You may be infected too! Will you tell other people?
Sure. I am not susceptible to zombie infection. I am the small percentage of the population that is immune, and in fact, my blood will be used to formulate a cure/antidote. Zombie viruses only make me angry, and you won't like me when I'm angry.

10. How does this story end?
I don't want to ruin it, but let's just say I will be sword fighting a gigantic beast from a helicopter and will kill it with a perfectly aimed rocket to the eye. My blood will be used to cure humanity, so of course I will be Knighted (Sir Hinchmanator sounds awesome) and I will humbly accept all sorts of awards and accolades and huge sums of money.

8 comments:

  1. I am so glad you answered these questions! I can see you've put a lot of thought into them. It was so educational!!! I especially love the Walmart answer!

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  2. Wow, way better than my answers!!

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  3. That's the best answer to #8 that I could ever imagine! .

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  4. WalMart is a brilliant answer!

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  5. I am Legend was actually vampires. Great answers otherwise

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  6. John the HusbandMar 16, 2010, 9:39:00 PM

    Fuegita, I am sorry but I am going to have to disagree with you. I Am Legend(2007) was definitely a zombie story, although the vampire angle does fit remarkable well, and I believe that is what the original was. I checked it out on Metacritic and about 9 out of 10 critics said it was zombie/mutants, although a few did mention the vampire angle. The big difference between the two being that zombies are generally made by evil science, whereas vampires are made by other vampires and are more mystical. For the record, I do have to say my favorite zombie movie is Shaun of the Dead and my favorite vampire movie is Underworld.

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  7. Too funny! Someone has definitely done his homework. You know, just in case the world becomes infested with zombies.

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  8. Love, love, love these answers. Sounds like a convo i would have with my friend Aaron lol. We've debated the differences of pegasus and unicorn before. :)

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