Thursday, January 28, 2010

Random Bits

Dear Bill Miller,

While I appreciated all those times you've given me 5-6 chicken strips, sometimes I really just need the 3 that I ordered. Most of the time I shouldn't even be eating 3 fried chicken strips since all three will go straight to my ass, but this poor girl can't stop a 3. If there are 5 I'll eat 5. If there are 6 I will eat all 6. I didn't do so well in kindergarten with that whole "sharing" thing. Sometimes I even think I'll hand 'em off to a homeless person that sleeps under the bridge where I park every day, but like I said, I cannot stop eating them. Then it leaves me thinking, "oh boy, bet the poor homeless person would have enjoyed those 3 extra chicken strips. They were mighty tasty!" and then I feel bad because not only did I eat the food intended for the homeless, I also added 3 additional chicken strips to my ass. So please. Please stop giving me extras.

I talked to my little brother last night and asked him what is up with guys that hollar at girls in traffic. (I asked John this question and as he is not one to hollar at girls he was really no help in this situation) You see, I was stuck in traffic the other night going home and this semi driver kept honking at me. I had no idea why. Thought something was wrong, thought he thought I may have been trying to get over or cut him off. I had no idea. Every time I came up on him he would start honking. A few times he would wave to me in his side view mirror. This went on for a good 15 minutes. Eventually I came to my exit and had moved to the lane on the other side of him. When he saw me he started honking again and even turned to wave at me through his back window. I finally gave a half assed wave back. So I asked my little bro what this was all about, and what exactly are guys expecting from this. His reply, "He probably wanted to see your boobs." I was appalled and asked if things like that really happened and he said, Yes, all the time." He even said he got some girl's phone number one day in traffic. Crazy! Women. Please stop this insanity. Please do not show your boobs in traffic. Please? Especially if it's my little brother doing the honking.

Went to Kate's big 30th birthday last night. I have a picture, it's not with me, but I have one. We ate at Silo and I had the most amazing mussels ever. They were like butter melting in your mouth. Absolutely delicious. Oh and the coconut cream pie? To die for.

Ever since I finished with my braces I have gotten more stuff stuck in my teeth than ever before. What's up with that? It almost makes me want to have crooked teeth again.

I have a giant bruise and puncture mark on my toe from my cortisone shot. My toe is even swollen from the injection. It is feeling a lot better than it was. It's mainly just the injection site that hurts. Mean old hottie Dr.

1 comment:

  1. It is when they stop honking at you that you need to worry.

    Hilarious post, glad that Monica sent me here.

    ReplyDelete

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