Tuesday, September 15, 2009

In Honor of My Two Year Anniversary

I should probably do some loving tribute to dear old John, but that's just not my style. I will say, I do love you babe and have enjoyed the last two years of being married! Looking forward to the many more to come!

Moving on, my lovely sister in law is the queen of email forwards. They're always funny (and sometimes workplace inappropriate) so I don't really mind. We'd have a problem if she sent me "scroll down and make a wish and now forward this to 50 of your closest friends or you'll have 10 years bad sex. Oh and Bill Gates will also be sending you a check real soon as will the UK lottery. The African Prince also thanks you for allowing him to transfer over his millions into your bank account.

She sent me this today (a supposed Washington Post contest, but you never know with some of these email forwards. I'll have to go and double check the fact or fiction of it on Snopes later) and I thought it was especially funny since it's also my anniversary. I'm now sharing these gems with all of you, well, unless you've already received this email forward. Then you can stop reading.

A Washington Post competition asked for a two line rhyme with the most romantic first line, but the least romantic second line.

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

I thought that I could love no other --
that is until I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take that paper bag off your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes --
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to hell.'

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts tequila, one part lime

3 comments:

  1. Love. This.


    Seriously.

    ReplyDelete
  2. HIGHlarious! Just had to read it out loud to J!!

    ReplyDelete

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